Sunday, July 18, 2010

Cleaning A Bain Ultra

But what people around there?

Days agitated.
We're leaving home to go into the new mansion on Via del Linaiolo (Linajolo). In the meantime we try to replace the old rooms. To be honest I have not done much (they are immersed in the research of the thesis), but I got to experience the pleasant "experience socio-anthropological" to answer calls of aspiring tenants. Illustrate the variety of "human cases" would be impossible, I will transcribe only three telephone calls that most annoyed me.
Here you go.

Case number one: caring mother who calls instead of the demented daughter who is afraid to call.
PHONE: RIING! RIING!

-ME: Hello?

-ANONYMOUS: (Voice of adult women) Marco? Are you Mark?

-ME: No ma'am, are Michael, tell me ... [But who the fuck is this?]

-ANONYMOUS: Mark is not there?

-IO [vo ch And on Mark! You Home ...] Lady if the home can also mean me ...

-ANONYMOUS: Ahh, okay! But the individual is free? My daughter and her friend go to do medicine (he says with a tone of pride). It is connected with the hospital to the home? "

-IO: [But your daughter did not have the language? Yo, the sewer rats have eaten?] The rooms are free and the home is well connected with the hospital [Fa medicine your daughter?! You know what I'll fuck?]. He wants to come and see you lady? [Come on come on! For students of the polyclinic is perfect!]

-ANONYMOUS: Yes yes, we are concerned. But if there are males in home? It is a mixed house?

-IO: [!!!] Yes sir, there's another guy in the third single ... The house would be mixed. [Now the houses are sexed ...]

-ANONYMOUS: Ahh then ... No, that is the friend of my daughter does not want to stay at home with boys.

-IO: [Sisi ... just her friend!] (Rest silent)

-ANONYMOUS: (desolate voice) So if they do not do anything . Sorry for the inconvenience. Good evening!

-ME: Please, Lord! No problem, I understand ... [I know I'm crap! Fuck you! So your daughter is not even a virgin ears! Trog!]



Case number two: the respectful boyfriend.

PHONE: RIING! RIING!

-SIGNED: Yes?

-SICILIANO (very marked accent) Hello, I'm from Sicily, I wanted to know if the room is free?

-SIGNED: [To me, you can also call from Ulan Bator (Ulaanbaatar)! What is the problem?] It is free. Will you go see it?

-SICILIANO: No, I am now in Sicily, can you describe me?

-SIGNED: [What the heck is so detailed ad!] Yes, yes! No problem! (Describe it).

-SICILIANO: I would be fine. Just one thing: there are girls in the house? No, because I am rrespetto boyfriend and my girlfriend does not want to live with other girls. Do you understand me?

-SIGNED: [I understand that some dickhead! But everyone here call?] No, there are no girls, no problem, you can feel comfortable [so do not worry that you ugly fucks no caveman], the other single is empty, but if you want you can choose a boy. [But those people!] Then when you want to see you again? [Like hell we come and stay here!]

-SICILIANO: Yes, okay, but I do not know when I get ...

-SIGNED: [cocks and sti! Mica is waiting for you!] Okay then, try to call when you're in town. Hello!


Case number three: a student who does not want a house in 'boy male. "

PHONE: RIING! RIING!

-ME: Hello?

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: Hello! Called for the room! Study in Law!

-IO: [Law ... Really cool!] Yes, tell me ...

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: (Silence)

-IO: [Why do I need to talk?] Tell me that you wanted to know?

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: No, I read the ad, I just wanted to know if I could come and see?

-IO: [What you waiting for?] Of course! When would you come?

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: Even now!

-IO: [Finally, someone who at least come to see the house is blessed!] Okay! I'll wait ...

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: (hesitant tone) Could you tell me who's alone at home?

-IO: [Madonna! It's a nightmare!] Two rooms are available, and the third is a boy.

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: Ah, I understand, but it is a young boy?

-IO: (Silence) [What the fuck you in the pumpkin? to know if a girl girl?]

-RAGAZZAGIOVANEeFRIZZANTE: I understand, I'm sorry but I did not want to live with young boys, I'm sorry. Hello!

-IO: [...] Please! [I'm still co boy boy!]

is this possible in the Europe of 2010?




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